My Worst Poem Ever

Welcome to the Agglomeration

Open Letter to the Masses

A happy poem.
A happy poem.
I have to write a happy poem.
How do I write a happy poem?

Think happy thoughts.
Happy happy thoughts.
Happy happy happy -
oh, this isn't working.

What in life makes me happy?
Overly happy people? Maybe.
Pretty and shiny things? Not likely.
Butterflies and rainbows? Definitely not.

Well, how about a happy poem
without happy things in it?
Oh wait, i've tried that. My gore
was criticised. So was my cynicism.

I could pretend to be happy, have
a protagonist with austere happiness.
But that wasn't good enough, apparently
his feelings didn't matter. Beastist swines.

So what else? A happy poem. A happy poem.
A major key? Well that's for songs.
A smiley face? Well that's for pictures.
A happily ever after? Well that's for cliched movies.

My fountain of inspiration has run dry.
Before writing a happy poem, I would surely die.
If my poems as they are cannot you readers content,
Well too bad, as a writer, I don't need your consent.

Take my poems to reflect myself and nothing more,
don't argue with me, I don't want to start a war.
If you don't think you will my poems ever appreciate,
then let your respect for me depreciate.

If my mood is happy, so too will my poems be.
But trying to force it so is stupid, you can surely see.
So please, loyal readers, have faith in me.
As long as you do, there will be poems for thee.

Till next time, may you agglomerate all your unpremeditated contemplations.